so this past summer

i fell for this guy … and just .. ignored it because well hes super and … yeah and 

im a dork beyond dork beyond dork 

then 

HE SAYS  he likes me 

and like a fucking dam breaking my little 7thgrade girl crush cascades into my brain

filling my vocal chords up 

making me more awkward than normal 

 

i guess i can hope for the best right ?

Protected: for when i fall

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Password:

Protected: how is it my ex love

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Password:

no need to bring me down

i do it for myself

i have high hopes

with lower falls 

and massive scars

if i do not tell you[im over you]

if i do not tell myself 

if i avoid 

that question

do you like him

because in my heart 

in my chest 

in my abdomen

i feel nauseous 

somehow in the best way

right before i see you 

and when your there infront of me 

i cant help but smile

but i dont want to be hurt

so i distance myself 

trying to make my self believe

that you are just a another 

bone i want in my body

because you seem like that kind of guy

shallow physical and time wasting

but i feel theres something else 

that attracts me to you 

and i see it 

sometimes 

i think 

but i like it 

… i like you 

i do

but the problem is 

im not sure if i can accept the feeling 

myself

[im trying hard to get over you ]

Protected: my dream

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Password:

there are days

there are days when the sun 

is just bright enough to 

make waking up early worth it 

when you hear the birds sing

and you do that little smile thing

that you do when its one one of those days

where i wanna wake up on you lawn with you

fight off time and mondays

cuz we love sundays

and the silly moods were in

make anything possible 

cuz on these days magic tricks 

and long boarding down mount everest 

are our reality 

work anger and everything is insanity 

and i love these days

because i can see love

in your eyes

and feel it in my veins

the sun is caressing our skin

time rolling gently 

because sundays 

end and begin 

with the birth of possibility

look up

look up towards the night sky 7

fill our radio heads with ’slow sad songs 10

and stare at blank ceilings6/7

when your to afraid to close your eyes 9/10

dream happy places and faces8

that always go grey 5

back to where you started8

live life half hearted5

you shut up 3

and shut down3

emotions  got hold of your abdomen 10

makeing you sick and so tired8

look up  for help but Gods left his chair 10

feeling nothing but cold air 8

on your shoulders4/5

where do we go now 5

were looking up for answers 7/8

from stars millions of miles away8

wishing for something better

you

 are 

  way out

    of place

     my dear

      early beyond

          early ,take your rest 

        its barely two

       your still faded 

     working on

the other

side of 

the world

my after noon 

moon

chocolate tofu pie

this is a story of survival

when my soul died

this thing was my revival

gave me hope inside

this love of mine has no rival

 

when you tore me down

I fell apart

My life was like a ghost town

And I was alone

I needed a new start

 

As I cried on a cloudy  meadow

The clouds began to tremble

And like rave lights began to glow

The clouds began to resemble

A face

A face

Long ago lost

And as the thunder rumbled it spoke

Melting the winter frost

Rising smoke

 

The voice strong like a battle cry

Told me the cure to all pain

“Chocolate tofu pie “

and suddenly there was rain

 

And here began my search of this

This Delicatessen

Sweeter than true loves kiss

A food that makes agony lessen

 

So I grabbed my long board

And off I went

Beneath this rain that poured

For the cure to my hearts torment

 

Traveling first

Down castle willian

Down san Salvador

San carlos

San Fernando

There

Right before santa clara

Buried like a jewel

So close to school

 

And I walked in

Indian temple teaching dharma

Spices that smelled like sweet sin

My new home good karma

 

And it sat there

My new love

Completely vegan to make it completely fair

Symbolizing peace like a white dove

 

So now I ride

When the boy breaks my heart

When I need a new start

When grades don’t cut

When I should have kept my mouth shut

When the kiss wasn’t so great

When my lying met its fate

When I begin to regret

When mother frets

 

Chocolate tofu pie

 

Chocolate tofu pie

Chocolate tofu pie

Chocolate tofu pie

Chocolate tofu pie

Chocolate tofu pie

Chocolate tofu pie

Chocolate tofu pie

 

Get s me high

No lie

Satidfies cravings

As I waste my savings

 

My addiction

Has no contradiction

For this pie is boss

Though not helping in my weight loss

 

Did I mention 

Chocolate tofu pie